March 22, 2004

• Nothing to report on the job interview....He wants to interview more people & will call me either way.  Cool, no skin off my back....

  
  

  Other than that, I'm about to rip my hair out.  Soap-opera caliber shit going on.  I'd rather not say as it makes me feel like so shitty, I feel lower than dirt.  This too shall pass, I know that, but for now, this is very aggrevating & frustrating & scarey.  I'm playing with fire & I really don't want to.  I made a mistake & I'm trying to rectify it, but I keep running into brick walls with each attempt I make to fix this.  This sucks.  It's not a permanent thing, but it'llk drag out long enough.  I can't wait for this to be over.  I just hope I can fix it by the easier of the 2 means I have.  Sigh/argh.  Bang head here!

  
  

  Tattoo appointment tomorrow which will be good.  Witches meeting tomorrow night, too.  Maybe that'll perk me up, too.  I can only hope.  I'm getting down...I feel like I have nothing positive in my life right now.  Work is fucked up, I have this major stress over my head, I have no one to come home to, or at least call.  My best friend is 500+ miles away, and I miss her like hell, and I want to get the hell out of NY....  I enjoy being independant, but I hate having the weight of the world on my shoulders.  If I at least had a partner, some to share this with, someone who I would support & who would support me.  Someone who would give the much needed hugs & neck rubs I need.  Sigh....Oh well.  Such is my life, I guess.  Stuck, living alone, in hell....yeah, that about sums it all up    I'm ok, pissed off, frustrated & lonely, but I'll be ok.

  
  

  Thanks for everything, guys.  Much love & many blessings to you all.  Good night! 

  • 11:45 pm
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