Happy Samhein!!  May you all have a beautiful & blessed new year!

Please…if You could all pray…My cat, Akhenaten, the 2 year old Tabby w/ the bad knees (see profile pic) just passed away suddenly, about an hour ago, after having a minor procedure done at work.  Please pray that her soul is guided to the heavens and that Anubis is with her and protects her until I can see her again.  Thank you.

I’m fighting a bad depression, but I refuse to be kept down.  I will overcome all this.  The fact that I’m in the midst of the 1 year anniversaries of everything just proves how strong and resilient I am.  And as for that ex….I’ve called Child Protective services & am calling the local SPCA tomorrow.  Children & animals should not have to suffer because of stupid people.  If she is going to neglect them because she’s too busy getting high & harassing me, I’ll make sure they (the kids & pets) get put into good homes, positive situations which they deserve rather than not eating well, not being clean or attended to, not getting spayed/neutered, not getting hit by cars, etc.  My job is to help & protect animals & I take that seriously.  Therefore, I have no quams about calling this bitch out.

Off the subject, I miss all of you like hell.  Xanga was always such a warm place for me & you all have been so beautiful & such an incredible support.  Please know I think of EACH of you daily, and you are all in my thoughts & prayers.  Please take good care, and know that I love each of you very much.  Take good care.  Much love & many blessings to each of you.  Now and always.

<Insert deafeningly loud, glass-shattering scream of anger>.  She did it again.  That fucking bitch wrote to me again.  I was DAMN polite & respectful to her.  That bitch had the nerve to say it’s no wonder I’ve been hurt the way I have & basically I deserve it.  That’s it.  I’m done being nice.  I’m calling child protective services, I’m getting a restraining order & I’m calling the ASPCA.  That bitch wants to play?!  I’ll make her sorry.  She thinks SHE is going to take Jay to court…She’s got another thing coming.  As for Jay’s “bad” sister that started all this shit…If I never see her again it’ll be too soon.

It was a bright and beautiful Sunday morning.  The sky was a perfect calming pale blue.  The clouds were white, fluffy pillows for souls to lounge and relax on.  All the birds outside sang to the glory of this day.  There was hardly a chill in the gentle autumn breeze.  All was right with the world.  Or so it seemed.  Somewhere, behind the happy dancing trees, and the glittering sunlight, there was pain.  There were no screams of pain, or cries for help.  There was no struggle.  No hitting, no scratching, no fight.  Just apologies and begs of forgiveness being whispered while pain and hurt were being caused.  All of it so brief.  Fleeting with the sways of the trees.  That was October 10, 2004.  That was the day I was raped.